John Darnielle decimates
In response to Pitchfork’s request for his top ten of the decade, John Darnielle (of The Mountain Goats) says:
Look, I want to say preemptively that I can’t feel good about this, because I have been conflicted about top ten lists all my life. I think my antipathy to the top 10 list stems from when my professor Barry Sanders broke down the word “decimate” for his Chaucer class back at Pitzer: “You know what it means to decimate a place, right? You wipe it out by tens,” he said. I wrote it down! I was a good student like that.
TOP TEN SONGS OF THE DECADE THAT AREN’T BY ZAZA OR SARAH DOUGHER, EITHER OF WHOM COULD RUN THE CATEGORY ALL BY THEMSELVES WITHOUT BREAKING A SWEAT
conveniently accompanied by ten-syllable descriptions
10. Planet Asia, “Havin’ Thangs”
cheaper, stronger than anti-depressants
09. X-Clan, “Why You Doin’ That?”
righteous grieving deep mid-tempo fury
08. R Kelly, “Ignition (remix)”
bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce
07. Dizzee Rascal, “Dream”
if you don’t cry to this you’re dead inside
06. Lanna Commins, “Nana”
out-Pulps Jarvis six days out of seven
05. Amy Grant, “Imagine/Sing the Wondrous Love of Jesus”
all-time high repeat count on my iTunes
04. Danzig featuring Shakira, “Hips Don’t Lie”
should be sung before all sporting events
03. Ghostface Killah, “Shakey Dog Pt. 1”
bow down in awe all would-be songwriters
02. Nightwish, “Bare Grace Misery”
you can’t be my friend if you won’t praise it
01. Christine Fellows, “Vertebrae”
real talk: one of the best songs of all time
